Welcome back… oh, wait - that would be welcome back to me.
I took a break. Part of it was the normal life is so busy and I just can't seem to bring myself to get on here and spend the time. Don't hate me. I started this blog for my mother in law when I was across the country - but that has changed, years ago now. My own mother doesn't have the internet - don't judge her - and so the drive behind this blog has managed to be set aside for more important things - like spending time with my family. I'm sure most of you have noticed that from the last random posts.
I will not make an promises about how often I'll be on here, but I did want to share some things with those who like to keep up with us. Stuff that takes a bit more than what I feel is appropriate for Facebook - which is where I generally keep up with everyone. And by appropriate, I mean length.
If you've read my earlier posts, you know that this year was a year of transitions. A year for me to slowly make my way back to the workforce. Not necessarily full time - but rather as something so I wouldn't go completely insane when Jacob goes into kindergarten this upcoming fall. I still felt being mom first was most important.
After much prayer, I went into substitute teaching. This involved me taking a test to get an actual credential. (I didn't know you had to have one until I moved here - other states don't require it) At the time that I began, I spoke with an educator friend who started talking about the other tests you needed to become a teacher. I chuckled and said, "Oh no. I'm done. I'm not taking any more of those."
So I began subbing - and I honestly can say I really enjoyed it. I felt like I fit and belonged - more so on some campuses than others - at least initially. My favorite days were the ones when the teachers actually left me things to teach the class. I loved it. The other days, well, I was bored - and I could see the kids were too.
Towards the end of January, I received a call one day asking me if I would consider taking on a long term sub assignment in special education. My first thought was "yikes… I wasn't going to do anything more than two, maybe the occasional three, days a week because I still have Jacob home", but it sounded like it would only be a couple of weeks and I was heading out to a writing conference soon, so I figured it balanced out some.
I met with the site supervisor, and felt good about trying it out. So I did. In two days time I was connected - heart full for these kids I was working with. It was a group of mild-moderate kids - not all at the same time. I found that I wanted to see them succeed maybe even more than I'd wanted to see the other kids succeed. I looked for stumbling blocks, talked with their teachers, began helping them in their very own specific focuses. It felt like I could make a difference. And I felt the love for these kids - and their love for me.
At one point I had been asked if I would consider applying for the actual position, though it was already going into interviews. The problem was, I didn't have the credentials. But it started me thinking, and asking questions. I discovered there might be a way to jump in and earn my credentials at the same time. It wouldn't be easy - what with five kids and a husband - that's a lot of schedules. Add full time job and classes, and you get the picture.
Again, lots of prayer and thought. I felt strongly that this was a direction the Lord wanted me to pursue. As my time in that position came to an end, I was asked to consider applying for either a half time or full-time position through to the end of the school year. This requires another credential - the short term staff permit. It's something you can only do once in your life time. The idea would then be to go into something as an intern - or rather in preparation for intern - in the fall.
A lot more prayer, thought and consideration. My impressions had me leaning toward the half time position. My heart was still in special education.
Things have played out - and for now, I am in the half time teaching position. I teach the reading program and work with the algebra students. I'm really enjoying it. Learning a lot. And the added experience of working in a classroom with a class that is "mine" and not just borrowed, has been wonderful. Though my heart is still with special education, there is a part of me that feels like a half time position would be a great fit - I do have kids to worry about, and I'd like to keep up with my writing - which is something else I know the Lord has guided me with. But I know that when it's time to choose which program to do for now, the Lord will guide me every step. If He thinks I can do full time, and school, and family right now, then I know I can. If He says it's best to do half time and school with a family, then the rest can wait. Right now I'm taking it one step at a time.
My favorite part is making those connections. Even these kids that I work with right now, who are mostly not special education kids (though I have a few in one class), need to know someone loves them, sees their potential, and is willing to help them reach it. I love seeing these kids come back around, their faces beaming, recognition that they are each important shining in their eyes.
This has already been a greater adventure than I would have ever dreamed.
Of course, now I get to eat my words - those tests I said I would never take are first on my study list.
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