Super Soccer Saturday

Amber enjoys soccer... so she fits right in around here. The other day she was out kicking the ball around with the girls, and then a little with myself. I don't really get the chance to be out there much. Yesterday, although it was suppose to be pouring, it started out just cloudy. So Bob hunted down his soccer ball, since the girls' and the boys' ones are youth size, and took everyone out (except for Peter who was way over tired) for Super Soccer Saturday.

I was behind on the counters and dishes... not too bad, but enough... so I started in on that. Then I decided I better grab the camera. It was certainly a time I want to be sure and remember. Everyone seemed to have a really good time. And after my little ones came inside, Amber spent some time working on some skills with Bob.

We're really enjoying our time with Amber, and enjoying finding many things in common!

In Loving Memory

In Loving Memory
of
Savannah B. Hurley

We will miss you. But we will see you again. This is for you.

By Heaven's Kiss
~Tara L. Nielsen

T’was Heaven’s kiss that brought you here
By Heaven’s kiss you’re gone
On angel’s wings you traveled
Your mission blazing strong

For when you first arrived here
A miracle was seen
A tiny little baby
A wished for, hoped for dream

A treasure and a blessing
A joy to all around
Your smile and your laughter
The most musical of sounds

So sweet and kind and patient
So tender, bright and true
So gentle, brave and strong
And so very loving too

I won’t forget your courage
As you fought this painful fight
And your faith and you’re example
Remain as beacons in this life

And then will come the day
When I’ll see you once again
And together we’ll embrace
As we unite as friend to friend

Then I’ll tell you once again
As the tears fall from my eyes
How I love you, my dear angel,
And we’ll have no more good-byes

A Great Mission

Never have I been more grateful for the gospel than I have been today. With the passing of Savannah in the middle of the night, I have felt a mix of peace, calm, and whirl-winding emotions. At times I have felt that I have no right to feel this way, as she was not my child. Still, the impact that she's had on my life leaves me in a bit of a roller coaster right now.

I have always, from the day I meet her as a baby, loved Savannah. She has been a light to so many. She loved life with such enthusiasm, taking every opportunity to do the things she enjoyed the most.

I am so grateful for the knowledge of the plan of salvation (also known as the plan of happiness). For it promises us that we can, through Christ's atoning sacrifice, not only return to be with our loving Heavenly Father and our dear brother Jesus Christ once again. But that our families can be united forever again.

The power of the priesthood, that magnificent power to act in God's name and under His direct authority, is so important. It is the means by which our families can be sealed (united for eternity) and allow us to be with our families forever.

I am also so glad to know that all who are sealed and return to be with our Father in Heaven are also connected through this great power and plan of our Heavenly Father. This means that friends can be united with friends, as families can be united with one another.

Though I grieve, for I am sad, I do so because I already miss Savannah. I miss her dearly. But I find great comfort and joy in knowing that she is no longer in pain. That she is with Jesus and Heavenly Father. That she is happy. And that she will be reunited with everyone. I am also grateful and happy to know that her body will be made perfect and that she will be resurrected again, just as our Lord was resurrected.

Until that time, the time of reuniting, I know that she has a great work to do on the other side. She is a missionary. And she will be a great one. I only hope that we can assist her in her work. That as she prepares the spirits of those who have not yet accepted or had the opportunity to even hear the gospel, that we will be able to complete their work in the temple. She has her mission, but she will need our help.

Busy Day - Double Rainbow

Yesterday was a long day. Bob had to finally begin the major fix to the electric issues at the apartment, so he was gone all day. The kids got to stay home and do fun projects - like paper lanterns and necklaces and play trains - with a good friend of mine. And I made a run to Portland.

I was picking up my sister, so I figured there were a few other things I wanted and needed to do while I was at it. For starters, Jeremy needed a twin mattress. Peter has learned to climb out of his crib, and although he's pretty good about not doing it, he does, every so often, climb out. He's also the same age the others were when we moved them to the toddler bed - only a lot bigger. So, in order to move him up and out, we had to get a twin mattress for Jeremy. So, thanks to craigs list, I managed to find one! I also managed to find a futon mattress... and since Bob is going to be building us a futon frame, and I was going to be in the area any way, and the mattress was a great price, I made arrangements to get both the twin mattress and the futon mattress while in Portland.

Then, since Savannah had entered the hospital for what will be the last time, I rearranged my schedule to leave earlier so that I would have a chance to stop in and see the family. I must admit that I couldn't bring myself to actually say good-bye. She was just so peaceful sleeping there. But more over, I know that although she'll be leaving this life for now, I will see her again. Her spirit will live on. She will be doing a marvelous work for our Savior. She will no longer be in pain, and when we reunite, it will be in love. And it will be eternal.


It was a hard. But it was also a wonderful opportunity that I am grateful to have been given.

As a wonderful way to end the day, a way to lift spirits and to (in my mind) mark the beauty of the Lord's magnificent love for all of us, we were blessed to see this beautiful double rainbow right out our front window. This, I believe, was the first rainbow we've seen from this house (at least the first double rainbow) and it was just the perfect ending to the day. I hope you enjoy the pictures. You might have to lot closely for the top rainbow because it was much more faint. But it's there!

I Guess I'm Getting Old

Jeremy: I was a baby once, right?

Me: Yes. You were a baby once.

Jeremy: Who were you when I was in your tummy?

Me (with a smile): I was still me.

Jeremy: No. How old were you when I was in your tummy and a baby?

Me: I was 26 and 27.

Jeremy: That's a lot of years!

Need Advice - Digital Scrapbooking

So for years I've been a scrapbooker.... and for even more years (or so it seems) I've not been able to really do much of anything with it because there are always too many little hands and feet out and about.... it involves unpacking, doing, and re-packing things... of which I didn't have hardly enough time to actually just do let alone doing the other parts.

When our PC died a few years ago, we decided to go with the ever better (more stable and easier to use) MAC... (okay, so I'm biased, but I do believe those things).... we love our MAC and it's been great....

Now... the two are coming together... I'm switching to digital scrapbooking. I just don't have the time to continue to try (and usually not get that far) to get everything out only to scrapbook for a few minutes and pack it all back up. I've been reluctant to go digital in the past because it was so limited (and you always had to use someone else's designs and templates). But the digital scrapbooking world has comes leaps and bounds and I've loved the stuff I see my friend doing (and other's in the digital scrapbooking world). So, we're making the jump!

The girls and I tried out iRemember..... we struggled with the platform at first because, really, it could have been easier to use... after all, everything else in the MAC world is drag and drop! But once we worked around that, we enjoyed it..... that is until I started converting my layered pages into jpeg files (necessary for printing)... suddenly my nice, crisp pictures (pages) were suddenly slightly fuzzy... and often the words were missing parts (letters or parts of letters). I don't know what happened, but I didn't like that. Thank goodness I was still only using the trial version... that's one program I won't buy!

But.... for those of you out there who do digital scrapbooking on a MAC, I was curious what your opinions were about the software you use. I want something that allows me to not just scrapbook, but to create and manipulate things too. And I want the finished product (the thing I'm going to print) to be crisp, clear and just like I did it! Any and all thoughts would be great! Send your scrapbooking friends my way to add their input... I really could use it! :) Thanks!

Carpet And A Few Changes

Okay, so pictures didn't come "tomorrow".... we were so excited and then busy trying to get the house back together... that's going to take a few days. But, here are the promised pictures. A few are from before the carpet went in. You can see how ugly the "blue floor" really was (and still is in the kitchen). You can also see the stuff stacked up high and all around... just a couple of each. And then there's Jeremy.... he got into the crib to have his "greenies" because he was so tired from our very late night the night before....the crib was on top of the desk out in the kitchen! :)

And then you can see a couple of carpet pictures... everyone was really enjoying them. We did the same color throughout.... so, two rooms downstairs, and the entire upstairs. We also moved Bob and me downstairs.... the room we had been in upstairs is larger and we're going to use that as the as the "activity room".... we'll put a desk in it, and lots of shelves. That's where the kids books will be kept, the games, the "project stuff" (minus really messy things like paint and regular glue which will stay in the kitchen for messier projects), and any educational (home schooling) type stuff. It'll also be the spare room for when we have visitors over night... which isn't too often, but often enough that it's worth while.

Everyone is really excited about the "new" and the "change" in the house. We even rearranged the girls and boys rooms so they are a little more open for "upstairs playing". I'm not sure if you can see it in any of the pictures (I don't recall which one's I'll be posting in a minute) but Bob also marked out where he'll be putting in closets and thus separating the boys and girls rooms all together! That project will likely wait until winter or something like that since we can easily move the kids out for a week and block it off while it's getting done.

The next major project around here (notice it's all stuff for Bob... I don't seem to be very helpful in most of these projects) will be in the kitchen. If all goes well, while the kids and I are over in Vermont for a week, he'll get the back splash and the floor in. And he'll continue to plug away at the rest of the cabinet doors (and get the island finished) when he's got some time here and there. That might be awhile, because after Zion's Camp he's got more work to do for some other people. And over the next week and half, he's got apartment stuff to finish up. (That includes things at the first apartment)

What a busy man! But we'll be okay. We've got lots of boxes to go through and sort out... I even have containers to sort things into... and then we might actually be organized in this house... oh, my goodness!!!!! Okay, don't hold your breath... if it happens, I'll let you know! :)

In the mean time, we've got carpet..... soft under foot.... easy to lay on.... oh, the lifestyle change! :)

Noisy Excitement

Noisy.... that's all there is to it! It's after 9pm and the house is rockin'..... my head is trying hard not to shut down... noise at this hour just doesn't set well with me!

So why is it so noisy? No, we're not having a party... though the neighbors might think we are.... the kids are still up.... still up....

We've spent the entire day cleaning out 5 rooms (3 bedrooms, the "craft" or rather "catch-all" room and the playroom) plus the upstairs hallway. When I say cleaning out, I mean everything goes... to either the living room, kitchen, laundry room or outside... oh, or attic! Yes, everything! What a project!

We're getting carpet tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so excited... even if it was hard, tedious work. I can hardly wait... although I'm not looking forward to keeping three kids out of the house doing different things all day.... (some shopping and a doctor's appointment should help). Gabi gets to stay with Bob since she has swimming lessons in the middle of it all.

Anyway, at some point we'll sack the kids (and ourselves) out downstairs, to be up with the sun to make sure we're ready when the carpet and installers arrive! Until then, it's let the kids unwind and get really, really tired... I'm sure we'll be paying for this for days to come... but really, for carpet, I think it'll be worth it! :) (Pictures tomorrow!)

Faith - Peace - Sorrow

First can I just say that I've, in many ways, avoided blogging about this. It's not that I'm insensitive to the situations around me, but rather I felt I'd be doing an injustice to those who are most effected by it. As one whose mind never turns off, I am always full of thoughts, of questions, of insights usually left unshared. And in such, I have felt inadequate in my own ability to reach out to others - never really knowing what I should or shouldn't say or do. But with too many thoughts running around, I need to do this now.

As many of you who read this know, or have read from other blogs, a young girl is dying of cancer. When she was first diagnosed I remember a feeling of complete denial. I had just returned from visiting my mother, had only been home about an hour, when the phone call came. I didn't recognize Melissa's voice on the other end, and when she told me what was happening, I was in complete shock. All I could think of was "What? No, it was Jeremy who had the close scare. This can't be happening to my friend. It's not real."

For a period of time, we took care of the siblings while the initial tests, surgeries, and beginning chemo were run. All the while I was stealing myself, praying, and doing what I could to try to calm the noticeable fear in Kiara. She didn't know or understand what was happening. All she knew was that her family, at least for a time, had been pulled apart.

I recall when the news came that the tumor had burst. I was on my way to a dentist appointment, but collapsed on my deck in tears I'd yet to shed. Things looked bad. My emotions, kept in check to that point, were too much to deal with. Though I was not the mother involved, Savannah had been apart of my life since a couple months after her birth. She was like another daughter to me.

This was not my first encounter with cancer. But it was the first time the person I knew was so close to me. That night I sat, in the arms of my husband, and cried, asking all the questions there were no real answers to. I somehow figured he'd have the answers since he'd watched his brother die of cancer when they were boys. But such answers are not given or found so easily.

Not long after Savannah's diagnosis, we learned that my step-mother had breast cancer. I was already watching another dear friend go through this, so I had some idea of what would be happening. But my own emotions have swirled around in disbelief and lack of understanding as I started seeing the real world of cancer move in around me.

Eventually, though not willingly, acceptance rolled in. Hope showed its head as treatments appeared to be working. Remissions came and went. Some how it was all just the way it was. Part of life. But at least it was still life.

I'll admit that there have been issues that crept up which I have allowed to push me further away. As I mentioned before, I had a sense of inadequancy. I still do. Never knowing what to do or say. Never knowing if I should do or say anything.

As a seudo-writer, I find great healing in putting my words and feelings on paper. After learning about the tumor bursting nearly 3 years ago, I started to ask questions about what Scott was like and what it was like to watch him go through cancer. I began writing. A year later I finished a piece which I know was inspired by the Lord. Though it was written as a way for me to heal, a way to understand what was really happening, and though it was started because of a dear young girl's fight with cancer, I did not know then how close that story would really come to telling her story. I only knew it was one of the most touching stories I'd written... and one which I could not read very often for the tears it would bring.

Our family learned that the end was near for both Savannah and my step-mother around the same time. A double whammy. Something one does not want ever to hear. And though I still have not figured out how to do more than offer a hug, and a few tears, I have learned so much over the last year.

With my step-mother dying, I have had the opportunity to speak with my father indepth throughout the process. I've heard the pain, the wishing, the acceptance, the frustration, the lack of understanding, and the peace. I've learned to love beyond myself. Accepting another even when there has been history or anger to prevent it in the past. And I've learned to understand certain things which would likely make another cringe or think a person insensitive.

One such thing comes from the comments of "I wish she'd just die so she'd not be in pain". Understanding that it comes from love and not wanting to see the individual suffer any more helps. But more than that, hearing the words "I just want it to be over" makes all too much sense to me. One might see those words as hurtful, selfish, and as though a person did not value the sick individual. But having lived through and heard these words, I understand it has nothing to do with that at all.

There is the part of not wanting to watch a loved one suffer any more. That's a large part of it. But there also comes a point when one finally accepts there is nothing more that can be done. Nothing will make the person better. They will only suffer more. And it is God's will to have this person return home to Him. When you accept this, and when we've been told "two more weeks" or "two more months" or "this is the end" and yet the end continues to go on and on and on and on, you suffer in a whole new way.

It's hard enough to accept that death is coming. But when you've been given the time line, you brace yourself, and prepare for the end to come within that time frame. You have the opportunity to grieve, to accept, and to prepare. When it doesn't happen, there is nothing left to do. You wander in a stupor, waiting. Not knowing how to proceed with life. In fact, life seems to stand still. Though there are things happening, it's not the same. It's almost as if you're dead while living... just waiting... waiting.... waiting... not ever knowing... yet knowing it will happen.

Eventually you move on... living and feeling like things might continue. Then something else happens to remind you that the end is really only around the corner... you just don't know which corner that is.

Peace does not come easily to all. Understanding sometimes does not come at all in this life time. But knowing our Savior loves us, has died that we might all live again, brings comfort. Knowing that families are eternal, and that saving ordiances have been preformed makes it somehow easier to accept at the final stage.

But the thing I've been most fasinated with, have seen the most, and think that I've finally begun to understand is the role of faith in such situations. We've been taught that faith is a hope for things not seen that are true. That, I believe, is a very simplified explanation. A much more advanced definition, I believe, is that faith is accepting the Lord's will even when the answer is no and we do not understand. It is accepting that the Lord really does know best, although we often cannot see how in the moment.

I have seen such faith. I have seen the peace that seems to flow so naturally from such faith. I do not understand it. I don't think I ever will. For I could never imagine being in the situation of watching my own child or spouse die in such a painful and sad way. But I also know that such faith is needed in other situations within our lives; not just at trials involving death.

The words to a Janice Kapp Perry song "The Test" come to mind - the third verse, I believe:

Tell me love
Why must you die?
Why must your loved ones
Stand with empty arms
And ask the question why?

Tell me friend
If you understand
Why doesn't he with power
To raise the dead
Just make you whole again

It would be so easy for Him
I watch you and in sorrow question why
They you, my friend, in perfect faith reply

"Didn't He say He sent us to be tested?
Didn't He say the way would not be sure?
But didn't he say we could live with Him
Forever more, well and whole
If we but patiently endure
After the trial
We will be blessed
But this life
Is the Test"

Indeed, this life is the test. A test for each of us. And part of that test is learning to have perfect faith.

And for anyone who might not be able to grasp why, as Latter-Day Saints, we are able to fully accept what to the rest of the world is a tradgety, here's another poem - one used at the funeral of the brother-in-law I never met, and also used at the funeral for a cousin who also passed of cancer several years ago.

God's Child On Loan

"I'll lend to you for a little time,
A child of mine," God said,
"For you to love while she lives
And mourn for when she's dead."

"It may be six or seven years
Or twenty-two or three,
But will you till I call her back,
Take care of her for me?"

"She'll bring her charms to gladden you
And should her stay be brief,
You'll have these precious memories
To comfort you through grief."

"I cannot promise she will stay
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn."

"I've looked this world over,
In my search for teachers true.
In the crowds of this great land,
I have selected you."

"Now will you give her all your love
Not think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call
To take her back again?"

I'll leave you with a quote from my story, one which rings true and which speaks to the heart of the message:

"What love gives to life, Death can't undo"

Our Vacation Notes

Okay... have ya missed me? Okay, don't answer that... I might not like what you have to say... just humor me.

Jet lag is starting to wear off.... although the kids are still in the midst of testing the waters. What kid doesn't though?

Vacation was great (aside from me getting sick.... take a stressed out mom, add Dad to the mix and the body just shuts down.... more or less) The flight there stressed me out.. but it was so nice to be there finally!

The kids had a wonderful time getting to know and play with their cousins. Haley and Gabi really took over with great imaginations and lots if pool time. We even went to several places (sorry, I've not gone through the pictures yet).

Some favorites:

We hiked the kids about 5 or 6 miles (it wasn't suppose to be that long.... Bob planned the trip.... go figure) to find some old train tunnels. The tracks had long since been taken up and the Biz Johnson trail put in. It was hot and dusty, so when we finally came to the tunnels it was not only a great site, but it felt incredible! This was exciting for everyone (although especially so for Jeremy - our train man).

We went to Subway Caves (an old lava flow). It was neat to take the lanterns and hike with kids into the dark. We even gathered everyone around, turned off the lanterns and flashlights and showed the kids just how dark it was. It was neat to learn that while the lava was flowing the outer layer cooled much faster (makes sense) and the lava underneath continued to flow. That's what created such a neat "cave" to walk through! This was only one part of the volcano experiences for Gabi!

Fishing at Crater Lake (a true volcano crater which was then stocked with fish) was a lot of fun. All the kids (save the babies) caught fish... which we were able to actually eat a few days later! More fishing was done later in smaller groups with Bob, and that fish was turned into "fish sticks" which the kids really enjoyed!

There was obviously time to play in the river... where Bob and Adam spent some time working on the man-made damn.... making a slightly deeper swimming hole.. but only slightly! :)

Burney Falls was fun....although we didn't actually hike it this time (we did 4 years ago and it was great fun). We were able to see the large cascade of water... then headed over to the lake right there and let the kids play. Sandcastles were built... Bob threw his sister into the water.... boats raced by creating larger waves to play in... it was a nice way to cool off.

Later on, Bob took Gabi to hike Mt. Lassen... that was the volcano she'd been promised to climb. At first I was kind of hoping the whole family would go, but some how I realized Bob wasn't joking when he let us know that it was really not for younger kids. Gabi loved it... and really did hike the whole thing herself (with Bob beside her)! She doesn't have any sneakers now, since her feet had grown and with the rough hike she had wide open toes! They took some good pictures, so I was able to get a "virtual tour" of the hike. She was so excited that not only did she get to go up the volcano, but she also got to go into the crater at the top of the volcano. She even checked out the mud pots! (Boiling muddy holes... or so I understand)

Our family had a nice time going up Diamond Mountain.... where (after driving an hour or more) we came to the top. We were able to go up on a fire lookout and see an awesome view! Then headed out to the meadows where we played for a while before heading back down!

Back at Grandma's and Grandpa's, we were introduced to "Stomp Rockets!" If you've never heard of them before, check them out... just google it. They have a website so I'm sure you can pull it up. It was great to see everyone having a great time jumping on the bladder just as hard as they could to see who could go the farthest and who could keep it in the air the longest. The kids where laughing right along and got off some pretty good shots themselves!

We also got to do "guisers"..... take come diet coke, had some mentos, all while having a tube attached to the top and see the liquid shoot up really high. It doesn't last long, but it sure was fun.... especially watching the kids pull the string and run just as fast as they could to get out of the way of the spray!

Our family also made the trip down to Sacramento. There we met up with my sister and her family and went to the zoo. It wasn't too big, but considering how hot it was, that was okay. We did get to ride the "zoo train" which was (of course) a big deal for Jeremy!

We then headed over where the bulk of us met Aunt Colleen for the first time! She was such a neat woman.... I really enjoyed our visit with her!

The next morning we went to the Train Museum! This was what Jeremy had been looking forward to.... and although Gabi complained that she didn't want to go, she had a good time too! It was set up with all sorts of exhibits telling about the history of the trains, and of course, with several of the old retired trains. Many we were allowed to walk on and see what went on in them and how they were set up .... like the dining car, the sleeper car, the mail car..... and there was the "monster train".... that's my own title! It was designed to pull the cold cars over the Donner Pass... through lots of tunnels... both wooden built and rock blasted! It was huge! The the stairs was a whole section of toy trains.... with a wooden Thomas set up for the kids to actually play with (which was the cause of Jeremy running off by himself, tripping and falling head first into the corner of a display case... ouch.... the bump he had was horrible).

That afternoon we headed out to Fairytale Town....kind of like StoryLand, only the things were really just set up for climbing on... no rides or real activities. It was cute, for what it was, and the kids still had fun there.

We even took the kids to the Donner State Park... not that they were all that interested, but while we were in the area, hey, why not. And then we took them to Cabela's just to see all the stuffed wildlife there... they loved that!

Okay.... well that's our vacation in a nut shell.... I guess now we can move on to whatever comes up in the here and now! :)

Back..... With Jet Lag

Well we're back. I'd say that with more enthusiasm, but the idea of getting back to the grind of every day life isn't all that appealing. I'm suffering from jet lag... I knew it could be bad, but I had never experienced it like this before. So I'm just dragging. Bob doesn't have that luxury. He was back to work today.

We were very lucky... and blessed... a couple of friends tidied up and cleaned the main portion of our house! It was so nice to walk into the clean area... especially where we left it in worse condition then it normally is in on a daily basis! Thanks so much you guys! We've even, so far, been able to keep up with some of it. I'm hoping that turns into a habit that's easier kept than in the past.

Most of the unpacking is done, and I even got a couple loads of laundry done too... no sense letting that pile up again.... although I'll admit that I've not put it all away yet. Hopefully tomorrow!

I'm trying to pull my head back into the normal routine of bills, chores, calling, and whatever else lands on the plate. But more than that, I'm trying to take things one day at a time. A few months back I started having chest pains again. Severe chest pains. Bob gave me a blessing which more or less told me it was stress and that I needed to look at one day at a time and not look further. That's, of course, easier said than done. But now that the bulk of major planning with other people is done and out of the way, I'm determined to figure out how to focus one day at a time. (Looking only ahead for a little bit when absolutely necessary)

Being in California was a real treat. There were lots of people around so there were lots of people helping each other. But the best part was watching the kids get to know their relatives better. I know we came home the better for it. It was great to have these relationships strengthened!

Anyway, we did lots of fun things, but since I'm all jet lagged out, I'm not going to post anything about it now. I'll try to get to it next week..... (but we'll see.... we have carpet being installed in the middle of the week--I'm so excited--so we've got a lot of stuff to move out of most of the rooms to get ready)

Monkey Feet

Last week, when Aunt Marie and her family were still with us visiting Grandma and Grandpa Nielsen, there was a large can of fruit in need of eating! At one of the lunches, Aunt Marie came out, with the can turned in to herself, and asked if anyone wanted any "Monkey Feet"! Of course my children jumped in with the "not me's" and the "ughs!". But, when she turned the can around and they discovered, with laughter, that it was just pears, they joined in the fun.

Jeremy, in asking for more, insisted on continuing to call them Monkey Feet. ("Can I have another monkey feet, please").... Although Aunt Marie's family left on Saturday, and we've been doing a bit of traveling and site seeing the last several days, we arrived back tonight. I discovered there were more pears in the fridge and offered them to the kids along with thier dinner! Evidentally I used the wrong name! I asked if they wanted pears... Jeremy said "I want monkey feet!"

So, Aunt Marie, it seems Monkey Feet they are! (Thanks for the new name... Jeremy is truly having a great time with it)

And We Wake Up

So I didn't get it all done myself... thank goodness for friends and for Bob... we didn't get the packing done until after the game... and then left, finding we'd forgotten a few things... nothing we couldn't do without or pick up, thank goodness!

We had a relatively good flight... although with the mess of having to rearrange our return flight, they had to reissue our tickets. In doing so, they ended up messing with out seat assignments and put Beth 20 seats away from us! But lucky us, Bob speaks Spanish and was able to talk to the woman who ended up in the extra seat beside and she was willing to trade off! Never the less, I hate flying... I hate it because I hate the stress of it all!

We've had a wonderful time so far. It's great having the seven cousins all together. We've got lots of pictures, but I won't be putting any up right now. I will leave you with a couple of the funny / cute things I can recall... unfortunately, even on vacation, my memory isn't as good as it once was!

When we were walking back on part of the Biz Johnson trail (after seeing some old train tunnels), I was carrying Jeremy on my back. He said to me "You're cool, Mom"

Okay...so my brain is worse right now than I thought... I guess I'll have to just leave you with that. We're got more planned... and we're enjoying our time.

Welcome To My Nightmare

For the last several weeks I've been Bob-less.... Bob likes projects. He likes investing in our future and planning for retirement (I have to Thank him for that).... The two things go hand in hand. Planning for the future = projects.... lots of projects.

When he first told me about this new project, it was planned to take about two weeks... and he'd be around some of that. I knew that meant at least two weeks, probably tack on another week and we'd not see him at all. Aside from baseball, we really didn't see him at all. But he ran into a glitch... the roof was going to cost way, way, way more than we'd budgeted (to have someone else do it entirely), so Bob ended up with another project... adding to the length of time away from the house (this is not our roof... it's an apartment roof).

So, in addition to doing the roof, he still had all the other renovations to complete as well. Let's just say we're into week 5 and he's just finishing up... finishing up may be relative... it may mean that it's good enough but will require a little more time when we get back.... or it may mean it's really done. I'm not sure... actually, Bob is still working on the last bathroom as I type this!

That's not my nightmare... but what follows is:

We're suppose to go on vacation to visit Bob's folks! We're excited about this. I begged Bob last year reminding him that it had been four years since we'd made the trek and now we had two more children. And he agreed, we bought tickets earlier this year, and the day has arrived... more or less.

With his 'project', I've been left alone to take care of the house, the kids, the bills, the mess, the packing, the lists, the airplane screw-ups (yes, Delta canceled our return flight and since I wasn't the one who bought the tickets to begin with, I had to go through the run around to get them to let me take care of rescheduling our return flight!), the mess, the packing... oh, yeah, now I'm repeating myself.

I guess that makes a lot of sense since my brain hasn't shut-up in over two weeks. Lists and plans, and thoughts and organizing, finding activities for the kids, finding ways to keep them healthy, happy and out of the way, and finding myself going to bed around midnight and wide awake by 5am... even when one of the kids ends up in bed with me. Needless to say, I have no patience. I have not desire to do any more. I'm tired, I'm emotional, I'm needy, and I'm so ready to be done with everything....

As if that wasn't enough... we're now into the hour count down... with Gabi's last baseball game shortening the available time we have. I set out this morning to finally organize all the clean laundry to figure out just what needed to be packed... and get it into the right suitcases.... things seemed to be going well... until we discovered that one suitcase is entirely broken... unfixable without replacing the entire zipper... which I don't have. Two need repairs, which require little kids to be out of the way so I can get the sewing machine out. I feel like I should be pulling my hair out... instead I'm fighting with kids about cleaning up their toys so I can vacuum... I mean, really, who wants to come home to a mess... and crumbs filled with ants and bugs?

Peter is now cutting his molars... ouch.... and he screams all the time. Doesn't want to eat because it hurts, but then is more cranky because he doesn't eat. He won't let me leave him alone to eat his lunch (since he just got up from his nap) so I'm stuck here... which is why you're able to read about my nightmare!

Some people think I'm strong and amazing... I think those people haven't walked into my house in a very long time! I'm falling apart... okay, so really I only feel like I am. My house is actually looking a lot better than it has in a couple of months... but I'm not finished packing yet either... and that's more stressful then the idea of coming home to a messy house! I feel like I want to ship my kids away (even though I ran off yesterday, leaving them with a very good friend, to finally buy some clothes that fit... the joys of not nursing or being pregnant....). If I have to have another day of my husband being unavailable to assist with the children all day long, I'm going to have to check into the loony bin! (It's a good thing we'll be flying tomorrow... so he's stuck with us! ;) )

I don't know how single mothers do it! Hats off to all of you! I knew it was hard watching my own mother go through it, but man, I don't think I could ever pull it off! Two weeks is about all I'm good for!

Regardless, every nightmare has an upside... when you wake up and realize it's only a nightmare! For me, that will happen tomorrow, when we finally arrive at Grandma and Grandpa's house! ....And then the FUN really begins!

Can't Keep Her In Books

WOW!

That's really all there is to say!

Wow! Wow! Double Wow!

What's so incredible? Gabi sat down tonight with a new book... a new book she'd never seen in her life. A book I figured would last her at least until we left on vacation... even if she read it most of the day.

So, she sat down to read it... an hour later I walk into the room and she's 90 pages into. I can't believe she has any idea what she's read because that's just too incredible. So I take the book and ask her about it... she started telling me in great detail about the book! I was shocked, to say the least! Needless to say, I handed her back the book... half an hour later she had finished it... all 156 pages!

WOW!

Food, Glorious Food!

My kids have always been very picky eaters. They still are... or so I thought.....

I sat down to make a list of foods that my kids like and will actually eat... it was rather lengthy... so we must be doing something right. Of course, just because they'll eat so many different foods doesn't mean I get to make whatever I want... you know, certain combinations still aren't "okay" in the kid menu!

Anyway.. I've been really excited this week because I've discovered that my little Peter loves salad! My other kids will eat lettuce or baby spinach with Ranch dressing on top. Don't try to add anything else to it... that just wouldn't do. But Peter loves MY SALAD! He loves to watch me cut it up... taking each piece he can grab and trying to eat it before the dressing is on and then handing it back. But that doesn't discourage him from digging in and trying again and again... it's almost like he knows that eventually there will be Italian dressing on it and he'll be able to enjoy it the way he likes! With a little Italian dressing (the vinegarette kind), he'll eat whatever is in my salad and loves it! (I think he just likes the vinegar... but since he'll eat the food too, I can't complain)

Anyway, this is very exciting for me! I love to make a good salad... but sometimes it seems discouraging to make it just for yourself... or for just Bob and myself... last night, I made one for me and for Peter. When I told him (he had a late nap since we're trying.. though not very successfully it seems...to put the kids on a different time zone schedule)... anyway, when I told him I'd made him his own salad, he got so excited! Oh... this is fun!

I Love My Four

I know it's been a very long time... at least for me. Things have just been really busy and though some things have slowed, we're going to continue to busy for quite some time to come. This week's projects include cutting, sewing, organizing, packing, laundry, dishes.... I'm sure there is much more. It's mostly a catch up week before vacation settles in on us!

I've been very blessed to be jolted back to loving the chaos of my own family. I always go through moments of "self-pity" when I find things just too much... running too much, doing to much, schedules too much... life... too much. Sometimes it's easier to get back to the "grateful" side and other times it takes awhile... this time... well, it's taken awhile. I was getting there slowly, but having seven kids (6 and under) in the house (without Bob to help... expect Sunday and a couple hours on Wednesday night) really put things in perspective.

It was fun, and the kids got along rather well (which helped a ton), but then there would be moments when we'd need to go some where (like baseball) and I'd freak out... seven little ones is a lot to get ready, together, out the door and hope you haven't forgotten anything. Thank goodness Courtney and Matt have raised such helpful kids (still kids, but it didn't add much time to the out-the-door-routine)!

Running from that to Vermont for my sister's graduation was incredible, to say the least... I was running on empty... as in tired. Coming home Sunday I had to stop four or five times to stretch my legs, breathe fresh air, and cat nap... but, we made it. I slept great Sunday night, took a nap on Monday and felt a sense of peace and calm.

Service is great. Especially when you can see the Lord's hand in helping you out. And when you can look back and see that not only have you helped someone else, but the Lord has blessed you to have helped yourself as well.

Seven is fun... for a while... but, right now, I love my four! I think I'll wait until they're older before thinking about adding to them.... And now my chaos doesn't feel so much like chaos any more!

Jeremy's 3!

My little snuggle bug has grown so much! It's hard to imagine that he's already three! I've really enjoyed watching him grow... using more and more words (and signs) and learning how to get along with other people. I love his smile... though often it's a sign of trouble coming! He's sweet and kind, even when he doesn't think he is. This year he was so excited about his birthday.... and excited to choose for himself what his cake would be (Thomas, of course)! So, here's a little peek into in his last year.

His Year's Accomplishments:

*Going potty by himself
*Knowing all letters by sight (not just order)
*Knowing all letter sounds
*Beginning to blend letter sounds
*Counting to 20
*Dressing himself (completely)
*Jigsaw Puzzles

His Year's Firsts:

*T-ball
*Eating Red Hot Dogs
*Getting lost (escaping nursery)
*Two wheel bike ride (with training wheels, of course)
*Completion of jigsaw puzzle by himself

His Favorite Foods:

*Pizza
*Red Hot Dogs
*Mac & Cheese
*Chicken (most meats, really)
*Peas
*Corn on the Cob
*Sausage (Kielbasa)
*Ice cream (especially Strawberry)
*Cake (any kind)
*watermellon
*baby oranges (mandarin oranges)
* and the list could go on forever... he likes to eat!

His Favorite Activities:

*Bugging Beth ("It's boring not bugging Bethie")
*Playing with trucks, cars
*Building tracks and running trains
*Reading "Brown Bear, Brown Bear" and "Blue Hat, Green Hat"

His Favorite Colors:

*Green
*Blue

His Favorite Sayings:

*But I still love you
*Yeah-ah
*That's silly
*I'm just jokin'
*Noooo, Peter
*It's not fair
*No...no, no, no, no

His Year In Pictures:

Tia Has Graduated!

My little sister is not so little any more... actually, she's not been so little in a rather long time (I'm the shortest one in the family). Still, she was the little baby that I helped take care of, helped teach to walk, helped potty train, helped learn to tie her shoes... and many more things. She was on my hip almost as much as on Mom's! I remember holding her at the floating bridge so she could throw the lilacs over into the water (a tradition we had on Memorial Day). I remember lugging her around school (after hours) for sports events. I remember her first day of school, her first loose tooth, her first dance recital, her first steps, first words, first foods, first laugh, etc.

We were always very close. It seemed that right up until I left for college I was like a second mother to her. And, I suppose, because of that bond, we've been really close ever since. She's been through a lot, and she's always known that we love her know matter what. That we're rooting for her to succeed, and helping her find her way.

So Saturday was a very special day! Any time someone graduates, it's special. But Ariel had so many odds against her...especially over this last year. Even when she'd over come one challenge, another would get in her way. At times it seemed that there were people around her trying to deliberately keep her from succeeding because of her choices and circumstances. Though truly difficult, she managed to defy them and to rise above and succeed! Most others in her situation would have dropped out of school. Ariel not only finished, graduated, but she's going to college to become a Math Teacher!

It was wonderful to be a part of celebrating such a great accomplishment! It was also hard because I had my first taste of that heart-stabbing "she's grown up" feeling that is both happy and sad... happy because she's done something great and starting a new part of her life. And sad because the little girl is gone.... she's grown up... and soon she'll be moving on completely. (I know it will be a million times worse when it's my own children)

It's moments like these that I am so thankful for the sealing power which binds families together forever. So although she's moving on, moving up, and becoming a better person, having a life of her own, she's still always a part of me....of us.

Tia, we love you so much! We're so happy for you! Excited for you! And wherever you are... you'll always have our love and prayers with you! Congratulations, Little Sister!

Jeremy's Parties

So, Jeremy turned three.. but we were gone... so I haven't put up his special blog yet... that will come along with everything else today! But since we knew we'd be gone, we decided to have a little celebration a few days earlier.

Jeremy insisted on a 3-D Thomas cake... which is what I did. It was my first attempt at such a recreation... and I think it turned out okay. I'm sure, if I needed to do it again, that there are a few things I'd do a little differently (like make sure I had red food coloring when I first started... instead of discovering it later and needed Bob to bring some home....and using toothpicks to keep the smoke stack from tipping to the side). Jeremy loved it, and that's what mattered!

He wanted more "train stuff" meaning things to go with his wooden trains and tracks. That's something everyone loves to play with, so expanding it was fine for us. He also wanted Thomas the Tank Engine for his wooden tracks (he already has him for the electric tracks), so that's what we got him... actually, Thomas, Annie, Clarabell, Percy, The Sodor Caboose, and the Sodor Gas car. We also go him a few more pieces.

Then from the kids (we had both our kids and Emma and Lucy pick something out) Jeremy got a sand and water wheel, a very large Sesame Street Kite, and a large thing of bubbles.

On his birthday (Saturday) we were at Grami Cretia's because Tia was graduating. But after she left for project grad (which was a cruise and trip to fun town), we had a Cookies n' Cream Ice Cream Cake... the girls made stories, a Thomas necklace (which Bethie calls a neckle-less), and a birthday hat. Grami and Grampi got Jeremy more track pieces... so we have quite the set up here at home right now. (We're starting a list of what types of pieces we need to make the track more functional....and more fun for all the kids to play at the same time. Over the next many years, we'll probably add pieces here and there.) He also go a Thomas kite (and much better size from him).



Anyway... he had a wonderful time and loves that he is three... although we had him confused... he thought he was three at the first party, and then, since he was having a second party, he thought he was four and didn't want to be yet... he hadn't had the fun of being three yet. So I explained things, and he was happy to just be three.... and now he's a "big boy" whose hair grows fast because he's a "big boy".... I just think it's funny that he thinks of himself as being a big boy now and not back when we first started telling him that he was! :)

Okay... the Special Tribute to Jeremy will come next!

Reid State Park

So Gabi had a field trip... almost a week ago now. It was fun... we drove down in the van (Gabi, Beth, Lucy, Emma and myself) even though we'd been invited to ride down on the bus. We liked the idea of being spoiled with the air conditioner and DVD players!





We spent the time on the beach... at first it was wave jumping... or more accurately, it was getting their feet wet and turning and running while yelling when the waves came in. :)
















We spent some time on the rocks... which were slippery in some areas... and since the kids weren't all that sure-footed, we stayed mostly on the dry ones. It was pretty to look out around us.... even with all the fog.














A favorite part was collecting sea shells... which were mostly broken... and which we've saved for projects.












Emma and Lucy really enjoyed playing in the sand... building it up some times, and then drawing in it other times.












We even saw this neat fort made out of driftwood. I have no idea who made it, but it was neat!

A Little Storm

Just real quick....I have permission to post pictures, so I'll do beach pictures later. Gabi had a field trip and I took her, Beth, Lucy and Emma. I'll tell you about with the pictures.

But... we have not had out the sprinkler yet... too many thunder storms.... Last night was a real adventure! Gabi had a baseball game that I ran her down to. I took the two babies with me (since I'd been away from them all day... and Jeremy was fine staying behind). As we're watching the game, I suddenly see lighting....four times... the game got called. By the time we were in the van, the storm was on top of us!

I got to drive home in the thunder and lighting, trees-bending over, windy mess (don't freak, Courtney, the Lord loves us!).

I only had to stop once for a tree across the road...and thankfully it was in between a farmer's long wrap around driveway... so we got by just fine and got home.... to no power! We were out of power for 10 hours more or less. Not too bad, but usually our power is back on within a couple of hours.

The kids did well with it all... we got out candles... Lucy and Emma were exhausted and went to bed before my kids...though I'm thinking mine probably should have gone to bed that soon too...since they really got cranky at each other later one. I felt bad for Lucy because the storm picked back up in the middle of the night with very bright lighting. It woke her a couple of times.. not all the way, just enough to know that those bright flashes in the middle of the dark were scary. But she calmed down when we'd go in and sit with her until she'd fall asleep again (which didn't take long because she was so tired).

My favorite storm thing yesterday: Lucy was telling us about black outs back home and what can and cannot be used (ie...stoves, fridges, microwaves, etc) She started by saying "when we have blackouts with white thunder..." I just love the "white thunder" comment. No thunder and lighting.. just white thunder! :) Very cute.

Okay... pictures and beach fun later... when I've got another minute... time to get things ready for the day... before more kids are up!

Some Cute, Sweet Things

Well... two days down... five to go. Okay, so that sounds awful...count down and all. The count down isn't really about the other children leaving so much as it has more to do with when I'll be on the next adventure, then the next, then then next... yes, it seems they have piled right up.... but that's not what I wanted to share.

Lucy is very concerned about why people feel the way they do. I'm not use to those kinds of why questions. Today I was having an especially hard time with Jeremy... Lucy didn't understand why I was so mad at him. So, in brief, I tried to explain the situation. She just looked at me, then offered a suggestion. (If I hadn't been so tired, I would have smiled...it was really sweet) Never-the-less, she continued to speak sweetly and politely as I tried to deal with Jeremy (screaming in time out on my bed while two babies tried to take a nap) while also trying to get lunch together. She looked me over and said "You look really pretty today." (And that time, I smiled.)

Emma has such a great smile. She likes to do things at her own pace and by herself.....though she's watched the others from a distance and then decided to join in a few games too. She and Bethie were born the same year, and so, they've spent a lot of time together. Between yesterday and today, I caught Emma (six times) at random saying "Bethie....(pause)....I love you." That makes Beth smile... and me too! Bethie, of course, replies in kind. But I just love the sweet, sincerity in Emma's words as she just randomly tells her.

I was letting Spencer have his binky (I'm not sure how much of the day he's really suppose to have it) this evening after dinner. While the kids were picking up, Jeremy found that Spencer had dropped it somewhere... He brought the binky to Spencer and said, as he put it in Spencer's mouth "Here you go, Spencer-Butter" (This, of course, is sweet and cute to me because that's one of Peter's nicknames... Peter Butter....see how it works)

Okay... well that's the fun that's made me smile most these last couple of days... the kids are so excited about getting out the octopus sprinkler tomorrow! The Beach (for the girls) on Tuesday with Gabi's class... and then... they don't know it yet... we'll celebrate Jeremy's birthday Wednesday! Thursday and Friday we'll spend making Father's Day gifts and then getting packed up! We've got a busy... fun.... week ahead.

The Prairie, The Mess, The Kids

Today marks the first of several days with 7 kids. No, they are not all mine... so, no, you did not miss anything! :) Some friends of ours are getting away for a little while, so we offered to take their children. Two girls and a boy... all friends with our kids.

Considering how little Bob has been able to be home to do anything with our own children over the last several weeks do to apartment renovation and repairs, our own children have gone into their own "coping" stages. Coping, of course, being used rather loosely. Jeremy is suddenly having trouble getting to the potty on time; Gabi is almost always crabby and cries at everything (even before you can talk); Bethie doesn't seem to understand what sleep is any more... and thus is cranky and crying most of the day; and Peter has decided mom can't be out of his site for more than 5 minutes, and most of the time has to be carried!

With this going on, I'm hoping the distraction of friends will pull them back together for a little while (since Bob still has a roof to replace)! Bob did take the morning off from the apartments to spend with the kids. And we'll be spending the whole day together tomorrow (originally Bob was going to travel to his speaking assignment without us so that I could be at our own ward working on Primary music....but this is more important for our children right now. So, someone else will be filling in for music).

Bob started by mowing the "prairie" out back.... with all the rain we've had, there hasn't been sufficient time to get the lawn mowed....and, of course (also because of the rain), it's grown rapidly! But with it freshly mowed, the kids will have a nice large yard to run around in...a swing set to play on.... balls to throw and kick.... a frisbee to work with...and whatever else their wonderful imaginations can come up with! Let's just hope the rain is done for awhile... they need to get outside!

Dare Devil

Gabi had another baseball game tonight; and since it was High Councilmen Thursday, I got to take her... and make everyone stay. I was hoping to actually watch Gabi...and did see her up to bat a couple of times...but the other kids very quickly found the playground that I didn't even know was near the field.

Peter loves the slide. There has always been one "smaller" slide that is actually one of those double slides every where we've been. He usually climbs up to it and then turns around sliding feet first on his belly. He loves it. But tonight that wasn't enough.

He was watching the older kids climb on those rounded over bar things that are just another way to climb up to the slide. He thought that looked like fun. So... he started up. I didn't even know he'd be able to get on the first rung... but there he was...three rungs up before I got near him. And he insisted on going all the way.... hanging onto the bars with a death grip so that I could not remove him. He did that a couple of times (I stayed right there because I didn't want him to fall...and made sure his feet landed in the right place)

But that wasn't all. The tallest slide there tonight was one that started over my head....and over my up-reaching arms. I know... I'm short....but still... he's only wearing 18month clothes right now. Anyway, he started at the lowest steps and climbed and crawled his way to that very top slide. I thought he'd turn around and come back, but he was too interested. He leaned out in the slide to try to see around the curve, lost his "balance" (he was on his knees) and started down the slide in great surprise and delight... head first. I caught him and got him turned as he came down the rest of the way.

I thought maybe that would have scared him a enough to stick with the smaller slides... but, ooohhhh nooooo, he had to go and do it again. Only this time he was grinning ear to ear because he'd figured out how to sit down, and then lay back to slide down. He started back for another run, but decided against it since the playground was suddenly over crowded with lots more kids... many who were climbing up the slide. That was just too much for him.

So... I guess.... what ever the other kids can do, Peter can too.... or, at least that's what he thinks!